Korach

The summer is very hard for us.  The heat.  Lack of child-care.  Lack of car. The heat.  Everything is uphill … both ways, and, of course, the end of the world as we know it, looming around the corner.

However, what makes it really unbearable is that my oldest daughter returned to her camp that she and her friend worked at last year.  Leaving us without her help for a month.  THAT is hard.  Ballistic missiles? Cool! Suicidal drones? No problem!  A tanking economy? Well, I don't have that much money anyhow.  But a lack of my oldest daughter? THAT is unbearable.

Sigh…

"The censers of these sinners, at the cost of their lives, let them be made beaten plates for a covering of the altar. For they offered them before Hashem; therefore they are holy. And they shall be a sign to the Children of Israel" (Bamidbar 17: 3).

At the end of Korach's rebellion, many of his followers, who decided to test Moshe and Aharon's authority, offered incense.  As a result, all of them were burnt to death at once.  And the censers that they used were to be beaten into plates to cover the main altar.

I always wondered, what is the connection between the censers and the altar?

So, I ran into a small explanation by Rav Shimshon Refoel Hirsch (I know somebody on this list who's going to be happy).

"…Since the text wants to emphasize the character of the censers as a 'sign': the censers will remain a 'sign,' which comes to teach and warn. In these censers, the offerers became sinners in their own souls! They sinned against themselves and brought about their own destruction! The text here connects the sin they committed against themselves to the purpose of the censers to be a covering for the altar: 'The censers of the sinners, etc., and they made them,' etc. The meaning of this connection is as follows: in their pursuit of honor, they sought to undermine the altar service that was commanded by God. In their attempt to do so, they lost their lives, and their destruction only served to strengthen the altar that was founded by God."

Simply put, their deaths were to serve as a sign that Hashem Himself chose Moshe and Aharon.  By reaffirming their authority, Hashem was also reaffirming HIS authority.

What Korach and his followers wanted to do was undermine Moshe and Aharon.  "Everybody is holy!" and with that, every man could "do what is right in his eyes."  In modern terms, we call that (spiritual) anarchy.

But the service of Hashem that we are involved in (symbolized by the altar) is non-negotiable.  It is something that has rules and regulations.  And when they sought to undermine all of that, they perished and their "remains" were made to be a sign to uphold the Torah, for future generations.

While we no longer have the Altar to remind us, we DO have history, and more than that, we DO have American Jewry as it stands today.  The last I heard, we had at least at a 70 percent intermarriage rate.  I was recently told that the Reform movement has even allowed their professional rabbis to marry out.  Unfortunately, when polls or censuses are made of American Jews, one is forced to wonder: how many are actually Jewish?

Thus, it's important to remember this lesson.  Changing things around, because one "knows better" or "feels better," will ultimately lead to one's demise.  We have a framework called the Torah and within that framework, we are given room so each individual can use their own strengths and weaknesses in their service of Hashem.  But, once you leave that framework, you are leading yourself and your family down a dangerous path.

Have a wonderfully quiet Shabbos! 

I had to take my son to Bnei Brak yesterday for a meeting.  It's not my favorite trip, since its usually 2.5 hours each way with bus/train switches.  On the way home, the stop before we needed to get off to catch our second bus, the bus driver announced that the main thoroughfare has been completely closed down, and he's going to have to go around to reach the final destination, skipping the stops in between.  So, we literally crossed the country (only in Israel can you say that), made a huge loop, and got off much farther north than where we were supposed to be.  In theory, we could catch a bus home, however, no further buses were going home, since home was shut down since the main road was shut down.

It turns out that the Druzim in our area were protesting for several hours, because their family members in the Golan were protesting, because the huge wind turbines that were built up there were finally activated.  Yes, you read that right.  I'm still trying to figure it out.

I'm sure there's some Gemara somewhere that says that if the State of Israel doesn't have some mass protest for even one day, by one group or another, it's a sign that Moshiach is on his way.

Five hours later (thankfully, that was all), we got back.

"And you should not be like Korach and his congregation…" (Bamidbar 17: 5).

Rav Pincus points out that this argument between Moshe and Korach was a "once in history" argument.  On one side, you have Moshe, who was 100% correct, and on the other side you have Korach, who was 100% wrong.  If you need proof, see the end of the story.

But after that, every argument between two people, is not a 100% vs 0%.  Each side has some truth to it.  It could be 90% truth vs 10% truth, but it will never be 100% vs 0%.

Once a friend of mind had a side business and somebody else in the neighborhood wanted to open up a similar side business, which could possibly hurt my friends.  So, he went to speak to him about it, and the other person didn't agree with him.  However, he did understand where my friend was going, so he either agreed to or suggested to go to a Beis Din to render judgment.  So … they went.  And in the end, Beis Din agreed with my friend and said that the other person was not allowed to open up his business.  When I asked him how the other person took it, he replied, "He accepted it without a problem, and he even drove me home afterwards."  All our legal issues should go so smoothly.

The key is to have the ability to see what the other side sees.  Even if you don't agree with it, it's important to still be able to see it.  My wife recently listened to a talk given by some psychologist on this.  And she called it "Intellectual Honesty," something that the world is severely lacking.

Let's talk about the divide in Israel currently.  Right now, the media and left-wing politicians have been pushing anti-religious sentiment.  Really, in many ways, this is not new, but it's certainly more than usual, from what I understand.  Why? Because they say that the religious need to risk their lives just like the non-religious and join the army.  The religious need to start working higher paid jobs.  The religious need to start going to universities.  What they don't understand is that most of the tzedakah organizations out there that cater to all, are run by the religious.  They don't recognize that most who serve in the army don't risk their lives, like Yair Lapid, who bravely served as an army news reporter, nearly receiving several paper cuts in the process.  Or my neighbor, whose daunting saxophone playing in the army band, saved this country somehow, and helped boost his career.

On the other side, when the religious ask for more money for education (rightly or wrongly), they don't understand why the secular population doesn't like it if many boys schools don't teach the core curriculum.  They cannot understand how the secular can't understand how learning Torah is important to Jewish society.  Perhaps they cannot understand why people like my other neighbors who have a son in the paratroopers feel, when they see other men at the same age, walking calmly to yeshiva.  Nor can they understand why the secular population feels threatened, even when the religious are put on the defensive.

Even if there are disagreements, the important part is to be able to put yourself in somebody else's shoes to see how they see.  I'm not saying one should give up on their beliefs.  However, by doing so, different tactics could be used to achieve the same goal, yet keep the peace.

Of course, this will not happen on a societal level, until all politicians and newspaper editors are lined up on a wall and executed.  However, on a personal level, it's certainly a wonderful thing to remember.  The other side might be wrong.  Perhaps you are 90% correct.  However, they still have 10% on their side, and you need to understand that 10% to help bridge the gap.

Have a wonderful Shabbos!

This past Shabbos we had some friends over whom we haven't seen in a good nine months.  So, on Shabbos night, there was a lot more conversation than usual as we were all trying to catch up with each other.  Out of nowhere, my 10-month-old daughter started "yelling," "ahhhhhhhhhhh….ahhhhhhhhhhh….ahhhhhhhhhhhh."  And we couldn't figure out what she was trying to "say."  Then she started to hit the table.  My wife had an idea and said, "You haven't sung any songs yet ... try singing something."  So, we started singing, and immediately, a smiled appeared on her face.  It appears she enjoys the zemiros every Shabbos.

In this week's parsha, Korach takes the stage and makes a failed coup d'etat.  One has to question exactly what was Korach thinking?  He wasn't going against some politician, he was going against Moshe himself.

The Medrash answers that Korach had prophecy regarding one of his descendants, Shmuel, who would eventually be one of the leaders of the Jewish nation.  With this prophecy in hand, Korach was convinced that he, himself was destined to survive and flourish.

So, what went wrong here?  Korach received a prophecy.  A real one as well.  He wasn't making anything up!

The Gemara (Yevamos 49b) explains that the difference between Moshe and all other prophets is that Moshe saw things "through a clear glass," while the others did not.  Being, prophecy was given to certain prophets, but it was a bit hazy, and it was through the greatness of each prophet that he was to understand and deliver it to the nation.  So, with such prophecies there was a certain element of … personalization.  The prophecy was entirely true, of course, but it had to go through a deciphering process before being delivered.  This was not like the prophecies of Moshe, who saw everything clearly.  For him, prophecy was the literal word of Hashem.

That being, Korach took his prophecy and deciphered it according to his desires.  Yes, the prophecy was true, he was to have a descendant named Shmuel.  However, he failed to realize that while one of his children, in the end, will do tshuvah, he himself will ultimately perish.

I could not help but think of a recent conversation I had with my wife.  Through some article that she had to edit for somebody, she learned of this concept called "the language of love," being that different people have different ways of feeling loved.  For some, being touched is a sign.  For others, hearing somebody say good things about them.  Some need quality time to feel loved, and others feel loved when they receive gifts or people do things for them.  It's an interesting concept and she had the older kids take the test.  And each one's results actually made sense for their personality.

One of my children, for example, scored high on the "acts of kindness and service," being they feel loved when people do something for them.  Incidentally, that child is often asking if somebody can make them this or that or do something for them.  With this in hand, my wife finds it much easier to accommodate them and to do things, even before they ask.

Before seeing this, we would write this behavior off as selfishness, laziness, or self-centeredness, which this child really isn't.  But for my wife and I, who are not like this, this is how WE viewed things, and being that we would view it as such, would be less likely to do it.  Let THEM do it, so as not to get spoiled.  But now, having a better understanding that for this particular child, this is considered a sign of love, we find it far easier to do things for them.  After all, they need to feel loved, and this is how it's expressed for them.

So, we see that when dealing with others, especially regarding one's children, one must learn to learn to see things, not through our lens, but through theirs.  Obviously, such a thing is not easy, but by attempting to understand how others "tick," one can come to better appreciate them and accommodate them, without your own personal bias getting in the way.

Have a wonderful Shabbos!

My wife does not like my rav.  She thinks he's a bad influence on me.

 

Two nights ago he called me about something.  After answering him, I asked him how his son's wedding was two nights before.  After he answered, I made mention of him having to go to all the Sheva Brachos for the week after and how difficult it must be for him.  He responded, "Nah, I don't go.   Who wants to spend hours at some meal, wasting time, listening to some guy give a Dvar Torah for 20 minutes, trying to tie it into the parsha and to the bride, who he's never met before?  It's just a waste.  I'll go to the one on Shabbos which my son's in-laws are making of course, and I'll go to the one my kids are making, because I know THAT will be fun and interesting, but that's about it."


When I asked how he gets away with it, he replied, "Simple.  I tell them that I'm a rebbe in yeshivah and I need to be there in the evenings, which is completely true."

 

He then told me about his Sheva Brachos many years ago, where his cousin "Jimbo" from Texas, who had just started becoming religious, showed up with a cowboy hat, cowboy boots, and a "geetar." "Now THAT is a  Sheva Brachos worth going to," he said.

 

As he was talking and I was asking for advice on how to do what he does, he heard my wife yelling at both of us, to which he said, "I bet she has a voodoo doll of me. "

 

Now you understand why I have such a good relationship with him.

 

"Then the man whom Hashem will choose, he is the holy one…" (Bamidbar 9: 7).

When Korach leads a rebellion against Moshe and Aharon, one of his main attacks was that Moshe and Aharon took the leadership positions for themselves, not allowing others to have a chance to "become holy."  They had some seemingly legitimate complaints, and it was something that was close to tearing the nation apart.

 

In response, Moshe tells Korach and his followers that in the morning, they, along with Aharon, will bring the Ketores, the incense, which is solely reserved for a Kohen to bring.  "Then the man whom Hashem will choose, he is the holy one"… but the rest will die.

 

The Be'er Yitzchak points out the Moshe specifically used the term "he is the holy one," not "he will be holy."  Being that Hashem will choose somebody who IS ALREADY holy, not somebody who is not and will BE MADE holy.

 

The Catholic Church, for example, works on a quasi-political level.  People get voted into position by others.  The person who is voted as Pope, BECOMES "holy," simply by virtue of his position.  Obviously, he has to have already displayed a degree of knowledge and piety to be voted in (in theory), but, in the end, he is voted in and becomes the "Holy See."

 

Judaism works on a different level.  Holiness is not placed upon a person by virtue of his position in life.  Anybody with enough financial means can open up and become a Rosh Yeshivah.  He could put on the clothes and carry around the title, and people might blindly follow him thinking that he is holy.  But, the reality is not so.  Holiness is not placed upon a person simply because of his position in life.  Becoming a Rosh Yeshivah does not mean that Hashem has ordained him with holiness.

 

Holiness is earned.  Hashem chooses the nation's leaders, not by what positions they hold, but rather what they have already achieved for themselves.  That is why you could have, and we do have, Jewish leaders today who did not come from the most illustrious backgrounds.  Here in Israel, we have Rav Yaakov Hillel,  who did not come from a very religious background, who attended university in England, and made himself into a giant of Torah, respected by other Torah leaders of the generation.  He was not chosen and promoted for his intelligence.  Rather, he worked on himself to the point where he became holy, and in turn became one of the leaders of the generation.

 

For us, non-generational-leaders, it's the same lesson.  We cannot sit back and hope (or daven) that Hashem will choose us for holiness.  The holiness we attain is completely dependent on how much we work on ourselves.  Any Heavenly assistance will only come after we put in our 100 percent.

With that, I wish you all a wonderful Shabbos!

My wife and I took our Annual “Do I Know You?” Vacation.  It consists of renting a car for 2 days and travelling around the North, while leaving our 13 ½ -year-old in charge of the house (we did come home at 11 p.m. to sleep). The unofficial rule is: No talking about the children (unless positively) or about other negative things.  We’re on vacation, darn it, and we’re going to enjoy it!  

The first day was dedicated to the Lower Galilee, where we went to the tombs of Chabakuk HaNavi (the Prophet) and Rabbeinu B’chaya.  After, we travelled to Tiveria, where we visited Rochel, the wife of Rebbe Akivah, Rambam, Rebbe Yochanan Ben Zakkai, and Rebbe Eliezer Ben Horkonos.  After a quick lunch, we travelled to the Arbel cliffs to visit a shul that was destroyed nearly 2000 years ago where, lo and behold, there was a bagpiper standing in the empty parking lot!  An Israeli bagpiper!  We were REALLY excited!  What are the chances?!?  I jumped out of the car and yelled “Ata Yodeya ‘Scotland the Brave’?”  After wondering why this crazy Ultra-Orthodox guy is asking such a question, he did us the favor and we had a free concert, overlooking the Arbel cliffs.  After that, we went to Tzipori, where Rebbe Yehuda compiled the Mishnah (it’s amazing to see a whole city being unearthed), followed by a stop in IKEA (for my wife) and finally, dinner at the beach (pita & chummus).

Day two consisted of a drive up to Metullah (on the Lebanese border), via the Naftali mountains, where we did a 4-km hike in the middle of the day, photos of tanks and APCs, and a visit to Rebbe Yehuda Bar Ilui, Meron (of course), and finally home.

We had a great time and we promised to do it again in the winter.

Now that we just visted Rabbeinu B’chaya, how about a Dvar Torah that he wrote?

“Separate yourselves from amid this assembly” (Bamidbar 16:21). 

Rabbeinu B’chaya asks, why is it necessary for Hashem to tell Moshe and Aharon to separate themselves from Korach and his followers?  If Hashem wanted to spare Moshe from Korach’s punishment, He could have easily done so.  Why did he have to separate himself from Korach?

Rabbeinu B’chaya answers that Hashem did not want Moshe and Aharon to be tainted by the negative atmosphere Korach and his followers created.  Just being near them could have an effect.  From this, he continues, we see the importance of making sure not only stay to away from people who can have a negative effect on us, even if indirectly, but also to make sure we come close to those who will make a positive atmosphere for us to grow from.

Have a great Shabbos!

I think I’m going to be a huge talmid chacham by the time my kids are married.  One of the most important, and challenging things, with schools is that you need to keep up with their learning, because, in the end, YOU are the one who has to learn with them.

Six years ago I took some time to go through Navi (Prophets), including Yehoshua, Shoftim, Shmuel, and Malachim.  I did it in English with commentaries, and it took me two years.  Since both boys and girls learn it, I knew I needed to have a basic idea of what’s going on before they get to it.  I recently started going through it again in Hebrew, so when my second daughter starts it, I’ll be ready.  My nine-year-old son is another issue.  He’s been going through mishnayos over the past two years.  So, even though I have my own mishnayos to learn, I’ve been learning his as well (which is forcing me to learn it better).  Now, this week, he came home because they are starting an extracurricular mishnayos throughout the country for kids his age.  They are learning one Mishna a day, the laws of agriculture (which I haven’t learned).  And they must learn it first with a parent to get credit (they must review with friends).  On top of that, the smartest kid in his class asked if he can learn with us (he’s one of 10 kids).  So now, I’m working on three "sessions" in mishnayos, and I have to know it well enough to explain to this kid whose IQ is double that of mine.  On top of that, they start Gemara next year, and that’s where I’m the weakest . . .

“They [Korach and his assembly] demonstrated against Moshe and Aaron, and declared to them, ‘You have gone too far!  All the people in the community are holy, and G-d is with them.  Why are you setting yourselves above G-d’s congregation?’” (Bamidbar 16:3).

As I was typing that pasuk, the Women at the Wall/Reform Movement came to mind.  It’s something they say against the Jewish law all the time.  Interesting.

I believe it’s a medresh that states that Korach had prophecy and knew that some of his offspring would grow to be great Jewish leaders.  One such person was Shmuel HaNavi.  With that in mind, he assumed that he was clearly in the right, and Moshe and Aaron were clearly in the wrong.  He didn’t even think of the idea that he was in the wrong, would die from it, and some of his children would survive, because he was so focused on his own success.

Rav Asher Rubenstein would point out, using this as an example, how a person can push himself in one direction, one mission, and always have special "glasses" that filter out all the "red lights," but keep the "green lights" in full view.  It has nothing to do with being good or bad, it’s human nature to do so.  That is why, he says, a person should follow the advice that Mesillas Yesharim says: always have somebody who is on a higher spiritual level to turn to.  The Mesillas Yesharim gives an example of a person who is in a giant maze.  Yes, he could try it out all by himself, but a wise person would ask directions from a person who’s gone through it already and knows his way around.

That’s where Korach failed.  He was a person on a high spiritual level, but he did not have a rav to go to.  He didn’t have that person in his life who can see things a bit more clearly.  And as a result, he, and several thousand people, died early.

I was thinking about some of the "go-getters" who have been in the religious world, who have changed things around or attempted to.  Take Sarah Schenirer, for example.  She was the one who started the Bais Yaakov girls' school movement.  Before her, there was no organized schooling for religious girls.  She went to big rabbeim with her idea, including the Chofetz Chaim and the Gerrer Rebbe, and received their support.  And while there were those who did not lend their support to her venture, she still moved forward with the support that she had.  She shook up the Jewish world, and today, Jewish girls are receiving an education on a level they probably haven’t had since the Bais HaMikdash was standing. 

Then I started thinking of some people who, today, also want to be movers and shakers.  They honestly believe in their mission in life, like Sarah Schenirer did with hers.  One is an internet celebrity, one is an American who joined one of the most anti-religious political parties in Israel (he’s their token "rabbi").  Both of these people have public forums (who doesn’t nowadays?), and both believe they have a mission in life.  But both seem to lack support from those above them.  All they have succeeded in doing is using their forum for loshon horah or causing trouble for the religious community.

The need for each person and each family to have at least one rav (not some "rabbi," but a real rav) cannot be stressed.  How many families have suffered from fights between husband and wife that could have been extinguished if they went for advice?  How many neighborhood fights could have been averted if "zealots" asked and followed advice (of course, then they wouldn’t be "zealots" any more)?  How many people, who have tremendous strength, could have been using it for good rather than for misguided ideologies?  Korach wasn’t a one-time person.  Korach is alive and well in each one of us, and it’s important to have rabbeim and rebbetzins in our life to help us keep Korah under control.

Have a great Shabbos!

Michael Winner

My wife and I took 36 hours off from life.  We shipped off the kids to friends, rented a car, and did a tour of the North.  We went to the Lebanese border in Metullah, to Tel Dan (where water from the Hermon comes through), to Har Bental, located on the Syrian border in the Golan, around the Kinneret, and stayed overnight in Tevaria.  The next day, we went to the gravesites of several tzaddikim in Tevaria, Tzvas, and Meron, and then returned home.

It was very enjoyable and relaxing.  The best was probably Har Bental, which is a mountain located a kilometer away from the Syrian border.  There are two UN Observers stationed there.  As we got there, they were speaking to tourists in English about their job. Now my wife, to put it nicely, hates the UN with a passion, like anybody with a brain would.  But she REALLY hates them.  I mean REALLY. So, as they are explaining to the tourists that their job is to observe the demilitarized zone and report any offenses to the UN, my wife piped in (knowing the answers) and asked, “So, I assume you have Observers on the Syrian side, to check on their weaponry?”

“Well . . . not really . . . you know, with hostilities going on . . .”

“So, you’re basically saying that you only report on Israeli offenses, since you have nobody to check on the Syrians.”

“You have to understand, it’s up to the host country to provide our protection, and Syria can’t right now . . . .”

It was really good.  Nothing like getting the UN to openly admit to their one-sidedness.

Okay, on to Torah!

“And Korach son of Yitzar ben Kehas ben Levi took . . .” (Bamidbar 16:1).

Rashi explains that Korach’s lineage stops with Levi and does not continue with Yaakov, since Yaakov davened (regarding Shimon and Levi), “With their assembly let my honor not be united.”  So, Rav Shach asks, why did Yaakov daven for this?  Was he worried about his reputation?

To answer this question, Rav Shach brings the Rambam (Hilchos Teshuvah 3:2) who explains that a person’s judgment is determined by weighing his merits against his transgressions.  Nevertheless, only Hashem knows how to assign deeds their proper weight.  Therefore a person must be careful about every action, lest he be taken to task over some matter that he overlooked.

For example, says Rav Shach, a person might be punished for the Shabbos desecration of his grandson, for if he had done a better job educating his son, the latter might have been more successful in his own childrearing.  Thus, the grandfather might have been able to forestall generations of desecration.

I like to think of it as two types of parenting that a parent must engage in: active and passive.  Active, is doing what we call “parenting.”  Teaching, rewarding, punishing, etc. Passive parenting is just as important, if not more so.  It’s the example the parent sets in his own life to the child, without either one knowing it.  When a person is growth oriented, hopefully, his child will see that.

Two examples come to mind.

One is of somebody whose entire family grew up in the Conservative movement.  In fact, his father was one of the biggest rabbis there.  Slowly, but surely, the entire family, including the father became religious.  He ended up leaving a very well-paid job, and suffered quite some bit financially.  He explained it to his son once.  “I spent years making a lot of non-kosher money.  Now, I’m simply having to make it up.”  His son went on to tell me other stories of his father.  In fact, I never heard anybody speak so highly about his parents, than this individual.  Why?  Because he saw the greatness of how his father lived, and recognized that fact, and wanted to emulate it.

On the other hand (there has to be another hand), our morning minyan once was suffering from late-comers, which, in turn, delayed the minyan.  I once got up afterwards and asked people to come on time, and mentioned that it was not just a nice thing to do, but rather a matter of halacha.

Surprisingly, somebody, who knows enough and is old enough not to ask such a foolish thing, came up to me, and asked me for a source that one has to come to minyan on time (I’m still scratching my head on that).  I told him where he could look, and the next day, brought in copies of the commentaries on that Gemara.  He took it, thanked me, and to this day, continues to come late.  His sons, when they come for Shabbos from yeshiva, show up even later.

Yes, not everything could or should be blamed on parents.  Children have their own free will.  However, after 120 years, a parent will have to step up and honestly say, “I did my absolute best.”  The “absolute best” is not only referring to active parenting, but passive parenting as well.  If a parent goes to davening on time every day, for example, and teaches his children the importance of doing so, then if his child does not follow in his footsteps, then he’s not responsible.  However, if a father teaches his children the importance of going to davening on time, and doesn’t do so himself . . .

This is why Yaakov did not want his name associated with Korach.  It wasn’t a matter of active parenting, he wanted the world to know he did his best in both types.

Have a wonderful Shabbos!

Michael Winner

One of the toughest things about living here in the summer is that you have nowhere to go.

After Tisha B’Av, there is a three-week break. Everybody has family to go to or to come to them. We don’t. In the past, we were able to meet up with friends and stay over and visa-versa, but since the family sizes are growing and the ages are getting older, it’s become hard to do that. Plus, not having a car in the north, makes it even more difficult. So, this week we purchased an above-ground 4.5x2.2x0.84 meter pool which fits perfectly in the back. We have to watch the kids constantly, but we’re hoping that they plan on living in it throughout the summer. I personally will have to wait until after Tisha B’Av before going in, since I don’t have the time now, but I feel, I will be banished there as well for most of each day.

I can think of worse things, I guess.
A friend of mine told me a nice piece on this week’s parsha.

As well all know and remember, during the forty years in the desert, mun fell every morning and was used as food for the entire nation. Where the mun fell for each person was dependent on who that person was. A tzaddik would have his mun ‘home-delivered’, he would just have to open up the door and it would be there. Somebody on the other hand end of the spectrum would have to walk quite a distance to get his.

So the question comes up… what happened with Korach. Korach started out pretty well for himself. He was on a high spiritual level and then sunk (literally) to a very low level. During the time that he was planning and executing his rebellion against Moshe, the mun must have slowly moved farther and farther away from his home. If that was the case, did Korach not notice this? And most importantly, why didn’t he realize the clear sign that he was in the wrong?

The answer lies with the fact that since Korach was personally involved, he interpreted these signs according to how HE wanted to understand them. He figured that since his rebellion was really a mitzvah, the fact that the mun was moving farther away from him meant that he was not applying himself fully in the execution of the mitzvah. He simply needed to work HARDER to overthrow Moshe!

Here we see the importance of pulling oneself away from having personal interest when it comes down to decisions, whether halachic or hashkafic (Torah thought). When a person has an interest in the manner he will do his best to twist things around to fit his viewpoint. That is why it is best to have somebody (rav or rebbetzin) to go to who will be able to listen and understand any questions and can guide you without that personal interest getting in the way.

Have a great Shabbos!

Frum.org will be taking a small vacation over the next few weeks due to the birth of a baby boy in the family!

We hope to continue writing as soon as everything is back under control.

Until then!

My wife and her friend were able to organize a “lesson a week” given by their rav, over the phone, to a group of married women, once a week.

You have to picture a much older Englishman with a big white beard sitting in his office giving this talk over the phone. As he is speaking about being a "mentch," he says, “What is a mentch, you might ask? A mentch is me! And if you’re not me… you’re not a mentch!” and then gives off a little chuckle…

You’ve got to love the British…

Okay, on to Torah!
If we can, please learn and continue to daven for the safe return of the three teenagers kidnapped last week by Arab terrorists:

Yaakov Naftali ben Rachel Devorah
Gilad Michael ben Bat Galim
Eyal ben Iris Teshurah

“And Korach son of YItzhar son of Kehas son of Levi took…” (Bamidbar 16:1)

Rashi explains that Korach’s lineage stops at Levi and did not continue another step to Yaakov because Yaakov davened concerning Levi, “With their assembly let my honor not be united." Simply put, Yaakov did not want his name to be attached to Korach’s rebellion.

Rav Shach asks what does Yaakov care if his name is mentioned? Is he really worried about his reputation?

He answers his question by bringing the Rambam’s Hilchos Tshuvah (3:2) where he explains that a person’s judgment is determined by weighing his merits against his transgressions. Of course, only Hashem knows how to assign the weight to each mitzvah and each transgression, depending on factors in the person’s life. He also can be punished for causing others to sin.

For example, if a person who keeps Shabbos completely fails to educate his son properly about keeping Shabbos, and in turn the grandson desecrates Shabbos, the grandfather might also be punished for desecrating Shabbos.

This is why Yaakov did not want his name mentioned with Korach! He davened that the education that he gave his children should be perfect, so that any future flaws would not be on his account.

See how careful we must be when educating our children! A person who fails in educating his children properly, will not only receive punishment for his sins, but also those of future generations. Nevertheless, we should remember the opposite is also true. When we raise our children properly, their reward is also our reward.

Have a wonderful Shabbos!

Michael Winner

Sometimes you hear news and you feel that there is very little you can do to help. Especially in the area of medicine. It’s scary. Hearing one new case after another; of this person suffering from this illness and that person suffering from that illness. The only thing that WE can do to make a difference is to learn and to do mitzvos in the merit of these people.

There are two people I know who can use the help right now.

One is the daughter of a friend of mine who has donated free web hosting for Frum.org on his servers. His four year old daughter has been battling cancer for around two and a half years now. Her current fight is with a tumor behind her eye.

Another is somebody I’ve known for 20 years. He’s a young father and husband, involved with outreach, who is fighting his own uphill cancer battle.

So, what can people like us do to help?

I gave some thought to the matter. One thing I’ve been more aware of is the bracha of good health that most of us do enjoy and take for granted. Every day, after we use the washroom, we say a special bracha thanking Hashem for making our bodies work properly. Therefore, I would like to request that everybody download and print a copy of the bracha, which can be found here - http://eng.asheryatzar.com/resources/21-AY-English-Ashkenaz.pdf. It contains the Hebrew and English translations. Then, you can right down the following two names on the poster:

Dafna Yael bas Rivka & Yosef ben Rus

Afterwards, you can tape it to the wall next to your washroom, and say the bracha in the merit of their recovery.

Okay, on to Torah!


“… of these sinners against their own souls” (Bamidbar 17:3)

Rav Shach explained how Korach and Company sinned against THEIR souls, rather than simply against Hashem. As part of his explanation, he quoted the Vilna Gaon who said that a person’s primary reason for coming into this world is to perfect his character. Therefore, if he neglects to do so, he might as well not be alive.

Once, a yeshivah student came to speak to Rav Shach about a problem he was having. When he arrived, he found Rav Shach in the middle of a meeting with several other important rabbeim. He decided to sit outside the room and wait until the meeting came to an end. In the meantime, Rav Chaim Friedlander walked in. After undergoing another round of chemotherapy, he looked terrible, nonetheless, he started speaking to the student, and the student told him why he came to see Rav Shach.

He listened to the student’s problem and was about to offer his opinion when Rav Shach learned he was there and invited him in. The student saw Rav Friedlander speak to Rav Shach and the other rabbeim, who then all burst out in tears. Rav Shach said something to Rav Friedlander and Rav Friedlander turned around and left.

Only afterwards, did this student learn that Rav Friedlander came to speak to Rav Shach, because he just found out that the doctors gave him only two weeks to live. He came to ask Rav Shach what character trait he should work on over the next two weeks.

Life is about pushing ourselves to the limits. The secular world does it by external means. Whether via scientific or medical discoveries, doing ‘daredevil’ acts, seeing how long they can stare at their iPhone without noticing the world around them…. But we? We push ourselves internally, by working on our character traits and developing into bnei Torah.

Have a great Shabbos!

This past Lag B’Omer I walked out into the hall to get a quick cup of coffee. As I opened the doors, I saw a chuppah set up right outside the shul, surrounded by some members of the kollel, an older couple underneath, and the rav of the city with them. Naturally curious, I went outside to see what was going on. It turns out that this “couple” was living together without any real (Jewish) marriage for forty years. Somehow, the rav (or somebody else, I’m not clear) encouraged them to “get married”. So… lo and behold, the rav put together a nice little ceremony in front of the shul.

The person I learn with in the mornings, goes every evening to different neighborhoods in the city, or kibbutzim/moshavim around the city to do outreach, with many other members of the kollel. Not long ago, he knocked on the door of somebody who turned out to be the chief of police for the city (a full brigadier general in US terms). Thankfully, she enjoys a warm relationship with the rav of the city, and was receptive to my friend. So now, he goes back to learn with her and her husband every two weeks or so.

It’s nice to see the large amount of outreach being done here. What’s equally as nice is the fact that it’s being done with very little fanfare. They are here to help people grow, and they do it.

You don’t see such things in the paper, but it’s good to know that throughout the country, the evil Ultra-Orthodox are quietly working to help finally educate Jews… about Judaism.

Okay, on to Torah!
“I have not taken even a single donkey of theirs (Moshe’s plead concerning his dealings with Korach)” (Bamidbar 16:15)

When his wife was ill, Rav Shach, the famed Rosh Yeshivah from Ponevezh in Bnei Brak, would take care of the shopping himself. Many times, he would do his shopping in the morning and wait behind a long line of children in order to pay. Naturally, the store owner would see Rav Shach and move him to the front of the line. However, Rav Shach would refuse to budge. Seeing the situation, the children too would tell Rav Shach that they wanted him to go first, and still, Rav Shach refused. He told the store owner, “Minors are not capable of granting forgiveness” and he would wait patiently at the end of the line until all the children paid.

We live, in what is called in Hebrew, the “Megiya Li” generation. “Megiya Li”, in short, means, “It’s due to me”; that I deserve whatever I want.

Recently, my wife heard from Rebbetzin Spetner in Jerusalem, that the main cause is from the parents. When we do something (good) for our children, we EXPECT something in return. Whether it’s “thank yous” or better behaviour, or simple appreciation for what we did for them. However, that is not the REASON we do things for our children. The same goes with our spouses. We are not supposed to do things for them to make US feel better, but rather for THEIR benefit. Of course, it is proper to teach (our children) and it is proper for us ourselves to be appreciative for what others do for us. HOWEVER… the satisfaction of our “emotional needs” should not be the overriding cause of our actions. When our children see and hear that we expect our emotional needs to be satisfied whenever we do something nice for them, then they we learn themselves, that they are also “due” things for whatever they do in life. They will never learn to do something for the sake of doing it or for the sake of the other person… instead, it will always center around the them.

When we do good for our children, spouses, or anybody else for that matter, it should be directed towards that person, not us. When we show our children that we can do things in a selfless manner, they too will learn not to focus on their own needs.

Have a great Shabbos!