I had a good laugh at one of our meals on Shabbos. Much to my wife’s annoyance, there are certain foods that have taken on names which she doesn’t approve of. For example, ONCE, when Rochel Leah was two, I made her scrambled eggs. Ever since then, she (and now the rest of the family) calls scrambled eggs “Abba Eggies.” Again, I made them ONCE, compared to my wife who makes them ALL THE TIME. Yet, I have the honor of having them named after me.
Another time happened several months ago, when my wife bought these weird “vegetarian steaks” for the kids for Shabbos. As they stared at what was in front of them, they asked, “What ARE these?” to which I answered, “snake steaks!” to which Chaim responded with, “WOW!” which in turn led to all the “snake steaks” being devoured. And “snake steaks” have been a regular request ever since.
This Shabbos, my wife served a brown, noodle-salad-thingy. Those of you who did not grow up with many friends would recognize this dish as “gagh,” or “serpent worms,” a Klingon cuisine (best served live). Simcha was pointing towards it and crying “want it.” I asked him if he wanted any “gagh” to which he nodded his head. After eating a few bites, he turned to my wife and said, “blah, blah, blah, gagh, blah, blah, blah”
I really feel sorry for her.
Okay, on to Torah!
I recently heard a talk that was centered around Rav Yitzchak Blazer’s writings of tshuvah (repentance). In it, he brought a Gemara which told over the following story. Once, a few hours before Yom Kippur, Rav (one of the leaders of the Jewish community in Babylonia) was heading toward the marketplace. It seems that at some point earlier a local butcher offended Rav and never asked Rav for forgiveness. Therefore, Rav decided to go to him . . . perhaps if he walked by the butcher, it being right before Yom Kippur, the butcher will realize what he did and ask Rav for forgiveness.
On the way there, he met with Rav Hunah, who asked him, “Where are you going?”
Rav replied, “To the marketplace. There is a certain butcher who needs to ask me for forgiveness. Perhaps he will see me and then ask . . .”
Rav Hunah replied, “You are going to kill the butcher!”
Rav continued to the marketplace and went before the butcher. At that moment, the butcher was chopping the head of an animal and yelled, “Rav! Go away! I have nothing to say to you!” At that moment, a bone flew from the animal he was chopping and stabbed him in the throat, killing him.
Rav Blazer noted that had Rav not gone in front of the butcher, the butcher would not have died. Yes, he would have had this sin on his head, which in itself is terrible, but perhaps the judgment would not have been so severe. However, now that Rav was standing right in front of him, and he had this unique and easy opportunity to ask for forgiveness, which he threw to the floor . . . now the judgment is stricter.
Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur are connected with the “Days of Repentance.” It is a time we focus on repentance and is a unique time where Hashem “puts Himself in front of us” and is “extra willing” to grant forgiveness for those who are sincere. If we use it wisely, we are gaining a great deal, and if we don’t, we stand to lose more.
My Rosh Yeshivah, Rav Asher Rubenstein, gave his “Four Easy Steps to Tshuvah” . . . it’s worth getting a hold of, if you can. In his talk, he explains that tshuvah is far easier than people think.
Basically, a person needs two plans to present to Hashem. A long-term plan (what type of person do I want to be near the end of my life) and a short-term plan (who do I want to be next year at this time). Of course, Hashem can say, “Plans are all nice . . . you had a few last year as well, no?”
At this point, you need to give a “down-payment.” What is this down payment? A small amount of real tshuvah, for right now. And what is this small amount of tshuvah? His example is as follows:
Suppose you have two boys in yeshivah who are sharing a dorm room. One of them brings in a whole stack of extremely inappropriate reading material, and the other boy happens to have an addiction to such material. Naturally, this boy starts going through the books, and finds a few books written by an author, whom even he cannot stand . . . but . . . it's still reading, so he reads even that.
What is a down payment for such a person?
To make it his goal not to take the books written by this particular author.
That’s it!
Yes, it’s best to refrain from all of those books, and it should be his goal; but for now, his down payment is not to read from the author he cannot stand.
What’s the logic behind this?
It’s simple.
There are two types of sins. One is a sin which is very hard for a person to overcome. Another is a sin which is very easy for him to overcome. The punishment for the easy-to-overcome sin is far greater than that of the hard-to-overcome sin. Why? Because Hashem understands that you had a hard time overcoming a certain temptation. Fine. It’s understandable. But not to overcome an easy temptation? That’s showing Hashem you don’t really care.
By taking the easy sin (which is worth more), and giving it as a down payment, you are showing Hashem that you really DO care, and that this is only a beginning.
May we use these next few days working hard on our down payments.